The Eternals by Clover Donovan

the eternals

1 out of 5 stars.

This is a self-published book and boy does it ever show. I got through it, but just barely.

My first problem is just one of spacing. This book does not have proper paragraphs and I never realized how distracting that could be until now. A couple pages in I thought the book was written in free verse poetry because of the weird, choppy short paragraphs. It turns out it is not poetry, just an author who does not use spacing well.

The action in this book moves way too quickly and descriptions are non-existent. Something that would take most authors a chapter to describe takes a page, cut down to the barest of descriptions and glossing over anything the characters might be feeling. You never get any sense of time or place because they are ignored. Emotions, if they are mentioned at all, get dealt with in a sentence and then the plot moves on. You have to read everything very carefully because a character can be introduced in a couple of sentences and that is all you will get of description. This reads like a high school writing project of someone in a hurry and unaware that writers usually use adjectives.

The final really large flaw is that the story is not fleshed out. Not just in terms of descriptions and details, just that the plot is so simple and short. Going over the story afterwards in your mind, you realize that there are no twists or turns. There is nothing unexpected to capture your interest. Boy meets girl, they run from bad guys for a very short while, bad guys immediately find them and then girl tries to make a sacrifice. It has as much complexity as a picture book and it goes by so quickly there is no time to get to know the characters, much less start to care about them.

This was amateurishly written and very disappointing. It was less than $2.00, but I still want my money back.

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